Distance Families
entry by Helen Ellis
Distance Families is an all-encompassing term Helen Ellis created for intergenerational families separated by geography. i.e. Distance grandparents at “home”, expats/migrants and their children who are “away”. It is important to note the term uses distance with a c, rather than distant with a t. This is because the latter can refer to strained relationships, while distance only refers to geography. There has never been a term before that fully embraces this family dynamic and Distance Families is her contribution to fill that gap. It then leads to terms like Distance Grandparent, Distance Son or Daughter and Distance Grandchildren. These clearly identify migrant/expat, sub-familial roles that are often overlooked. The words “distance” and “distant” often feature in conversations, research, and writing about intergenerational, geographically separated families. While the two terms are related, their meanings differ subtly and are frequently, yet unintentionally, mixed up.
• Distance refers solely to geography.
• Distant can refer to geography and/or the quality of a relationship.
As the founder of DistanceFamilies.com and the author of the Distance Families book series, Helen Ellis has often witnessed this mix-up. The confusion is understandable. The words are so similar, and furthermore it’s easy to assume that geographical distance automatically equates to emotional distance. However, one of her strongest messages is that distance families don’t have to be distant.
Comparable terms
Global families
Why this matters
Distance families matter because they are an increasingly common reality of global mobility, yet their specific needs and experiences are often invisible in policy, services, and even family conversations. Naming this pattern makes it easier for grandparents, parents, and children to recognize that geographical separation is a structural condition, not a personal failing, and to seek support and design routines that protect closeness across distance.
Cross-references
Expatriate Family (Family Dynamics); Left-Behind Parent (Family Dynamics); Commuter Assignment (Family Dynamics); Sandwich Generation Expat (Family Dynamics); Social Network Building (Family Dynamics); Family Resilience (Family Dynamics); Anticipatory Grief (Wellbeing & Mental Health); Ambiguous Loss (Wellbeing & Mental Health); Digital Nomad Family (Transitions & Mobility). Distance family is situated in the Global Family Vocabulary as one of the most common yet least named configurations in globally mobile life, where close family relationships are maintained across borders and time zones rather than within a single household. Expatriate family provides the broader structural context in which distance family patterns often emerge, while left‑behind parent and commuter assignment describe specific role and assignment structures that create recurring physical separations between family members. Sandwich generation expat adds the layer of intergenerational caregiving strain, capturing how mobile adults may simultaneously support children abroad and aging parents elsewhere. Social network building and family resilience highlight the relational and systemic capacities that help distance families sustain connection and cope with repeated separations over time. Anticipatory grief and ambiguous loss document the emotional impact of ongoing absence–presence dynamics, including the grief around departures and the unresolved, often unacknowledged losses of not sharing everyday life. Digital global living shows that these relationships are now largely mediated through technology—video calls, messaging platforms, shared online spaces—which both enables continuous contact and introduces new forms of fatigue, miscommunication, and uneven access that practitioners must understand as part of the distance family experience.
Sources
The Distance Families Book Series: Ellis, H, 2021, ‘Being a Distance Grandparent – a Book for ALL Generations’, Summertime Publishing, UK
Ellis, H, 2022, ‘Being a Distance Son or Daughter – a Book for ALL Generations’, Distance Families Publishing
Ellis, H, 2026, ‘Being a Distance Grandchild – a Book for ALL Generations’, Distance Families Publishing
The term is currently in use in all Helen Ellis’ work with Distance Families.com – her book series, her professional teachings, presentations and social media.
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